- Not mop the floor more than once a week
- Call paper plate night when I can't face another dish in the sink
- Not feel guilty for taking the time for general maintenance, eg: cutting my hair, showering, blow drying my hair, taking 10 minutes longer to shave my legs, eat, go to the bathroom with the door closed, and not entertaining a child or dog who both think I need help...
- To eat a real meal mid-day, not scraps or cottage cheese spooned on top of a leftover fruit cup over the kitchen sink.
- To eat cake as many times as I can in one week.
- To not feel guilty about taking 2 hours a week to exercise and putting my kids in the YMCA childcare room to do so.
- To be relieved of making at least 1 meal per week (eating out doesn't count, I want to see someone else make it AND clean up after it).
- To acknowledge that my kids might not be the best soccer player, as long as I don't say it out loud.
- To deny said kids snacks or drinks if they don't say "Please".
- To read my favorite magazine subscription someplace other than the bathroom and not feel lazy.
- To make grown up food once a week for dinner without having to prepare a side of chicken nuggets.
- To look in my purse and actually find a piece of gum, a quarter, chapstick...that my kids haven't stolen when I wasn't looking.
- To make a deal with my husband that if Brad Pitt ever propositioned me I get a free pass (concede that the same deal goes for him and Angelina).
- To buy a pair of shoes in a real Mall (and not TJ Maxx) and feel no guilt!
- To put on makeup without having to answer the question "Where are you going? Why are you putting on makeup?"
- To take weekend shaving breaks like dear Hubby.
- To make up shopping trips so I can put Munchkin #3 in the supermarket child care for 1/2 hour per week while I wander around talking or texting to my friends.
- To text my friends dumb things I can't call for because I have 3 kids screaming in the back seat.
- For my kids to know that I actually went to college and have a brain that goes beyond folding sheets and wiping butts.
- Embrace the belly pooch because it came by way of birthing 3 kids (or 2 or 4 or 5...)
- To not have to endure finding a new gray hair and a new zit on the same morning (seriously!)
- To love McDonald's Apple Pie even though it's far down on the food chain.
- To continue to love watching MTV as much as I did when I was 16 and it was brand new.
- To never tell anyone I remember when MTV was brand new.
- To tell my kids I'm 29 years old (again!).
- Feel free to add your own thoughts below. Thank you!
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4.16.2008
A Mother's List of Rights
Raise your right hand and repeat after me. I (state your name) have the right to:
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My girlfriend came over to refill my estrogen reserves last week, and brought with her a fantastic craft for us to do together while chat... -
Okay, I'm sitting here with a tummy ache as I write this because I am, apparently, unable to control myself. I ate so many of this new c...
I tell my kids Im 29 too.
ReplyDeleteAlso if I feel like ordering Pizza because I am tired of cooking, I can.
Love your mothers rights.
Hi! You've reached that point in life where you realize that you can only do so much! Good for you!
ReplyDeleteI did that, when I returned to college.
I noticed that the other "3 occupants" in the house had brains, arms, legs and ability to do some (most all) of the chores.
I posted mine prominently and it worked.
Stick to your own rules now and you'l find it very rewarding!!
I love the list...Will have to jot down my additions. Now, I'm going to get some "real" food for lunch!
ReplyDeleteI reserve the right to say, "Please stop talking to me" and have them not get offended. I love all their chatter but my brain is old and it can only do one thing at a time. If I listened to everything my 7 and 4 year old say to me, nothing would ever get done in this house.
ReplyDeleteI also reserve the right to BEG my 6 year old to talk to me. That guy never says a word.
Great list!