To Do List

My to do lists are so painfully boring and repetitive I almost can't stand to post an example. But, then I thought to myself "Self, why suffer alone?"

Juniper To-Do List (for the remainder of this week)

Go to gyne appointment
Clean house
Wash laundry
Fold laundry
Put away laundry
Volunteer at school
Round up Soul Sisters for a crafty get-together for next week
Baseball practice
Schedule the Peacemaker's 8 year appointment (that is already late)
Help Peacemaker practice for First Communion
Plan picnic for after First Communion
Clean house (again)
Help with homework
Groom dog
Attend school meeting
Clean house...I think you get the picture.

While reading Poetry and Hums blog she posted some fictitious to-do lists...what if I were...(dream sequence sound effect...)

Carol Brady:

1.Decide what Alice should fix for dinner
2. Solve teenage problems
3. Have Alice do the laundry
4. Sit on Mike's lap and say something witty
5. Make a grocery list for Alice

June Cleaver:

1. Polish pearls
2. Sign up for flower arranging class
3. Apply corn pads from wearing heels 24/7
4. Good naturedly scold the Beaver
5. Kiss Ward while lifting one foot behind me.

Debra Barone:

1. Love Raymond
2. Look for houses NOT across the street from mother-in-law
3. Change the locks until a new house is found
4. Threaten bodily harm if Ray doesn't take my side against mother.
5. Search for three children who are never around

Carmella Soprano:

1. Call all of Tony's mistresses and tell them to beat it.
2. Get my nails done.
3. Remember never to "go for a drive" with any of Tony's men.
4. Work on my New Jersey accent.
5. Cook Baked Ziti for dinner.

Kitty Foreman:

1. Buy air freshener to remove the scent of pot in the basement.
2. Crack a beer for Red.
3. Fix a cocktail for myself... for breakfast.
4. Plan a hot tub party with Bob and Midge.

Shirley Partridge:

1. Get gas for the bus.
2. Book "gigs"
3. Warn Danny that he will become a washed up, roid-rage loser in adulthood.
4. Stare at Keith's hot buns and feathered hair.
5. Keep Laurie on the keyboard to maintain lead vocalist position.

Try it, it's fun! Here, I'll give you some people to think about...Oprah, Angelina Jolie, Bart Simpson, Dwight Schrute... Choose one of them or come up with one of your own and give me your best shot!


  1. If I weren't at work right now, or feeling badly, I'd join in!

  2. lolol some of those to do lists are pretty funny... don't ya hate how doing laundry is not one task but like 3 tasks =_=!

  3. You are a clever woman. This is the best post I'll read all day for sure! You've got me thinkin' now...

  4. I never put "clean house" on my to-do list unless I'm having company. I just clean whenever I can fit it in or whenever the mess is so bad I can't stand it anymore. I will have to put on my list to find out who Carmella Soprano and Kitty Foreman are. I'm feeling so old right now!

  5. Too funny! I needed a light funny post and yours was great.

    Here is Oprah's list:
    1. Get another puppy
    2. Call BFF Gayle
    3. Run multi-million empire
    4. Get another puppy
    5. Call personal trainer to get motivated to workout
    6. Have personal chef fix my steel-cut oatmeal
    7. Convince Stedmen to let me get another puppy

    Thanks for stopping my my blog!

  6. Here's Madonna's list:
    1. Work out with trainer
    2. Have chef make a tiny little healthy snack
    3. Work out with trainer
    4. tinier, healthier snack
    5. Lock down all of those nasty books where I was naked so my kids don't see them
    6. Find another country I can adopt a kid from.
    7. Go to match.com so I can find another younger boyfriend.

  7. This is very funny! I love Carol Brady's "sit on Mike's lap and say something witty". I do that all the time! Don't you?


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