4.13.2012

Mommy Wars - Feedback Friday



So, by now we've all heard about the comment made by Hilary Rosen about Ann Romney that she has "never worked a day in her life". We know that raising 5 boys as a stay-at-home mom is work, so I won't even insult you with that question today. We all know that is a ridiculous statement.

I actually found more debate in the reason for her comment, insinuating that stay-at-home moms are out of touch with women's issues and the struggling economy because they are not in the work force.

It's Feedback Friday...

Is it possible for a stay-at-home mom be in touch with the economic issues that impact women today?


Part of Hilary's statement referred to the Romney's socioeconomic status, so that raises another question:

Is an affluent working woman more able to relate to the economic issues facing women today vs. an affluent stay-at-home mother?

22 comments :

  1. She has to know about the economy and how it impacts her and her family since she usually buys all the food, clothes, etc....almost everything for the home and family. Most women admit that being home full time with children is the hardest work they have ever done!

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  2. Oh yeah, when my husband lost his job and we had two kids in college and a mortgage and other bills and I hadn't "worked" in 20+ plus years...

    I was in touch alright. Just sayin.

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    1. lol, did I really say "twenty plus plus"? Well, it has been. And I was a little exuberant. :)

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  3. I used to watch the Apprentice. I think I could completely rock it and I’d for sure beat my husband. All of their challenges were things I do on a regular basis being a mom. I think they Donald should pick his next hire among PTA moms, b/c they have mad skills. For example tonight I am in charge of a fundraising dinner for 160 people (how did that happened-sigh). I’m sure I’m not the exception. SAHM moms plan fundraisers and events both big and small on a regular basis for schools, church and sports teams. We must be pretty skilled planners, organizers, negotiators, and economists to pull these off. Women typically are the ones doing most of the shopping and at least half of us are probably in charge of paying the bills, so we are very aware of the economy and it’s plain silliness to say otherwise. Maybe she thinks stay-at-home moms literally never leave the house?

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    1. I totally agree, stay at home moms sometimes have opportunities to get involved in things in the community that the average working woman wouldn't be able to which would give them insight.

      I think the two lifestyles balance each other out. Stay at home moms might learn about economics first hand through family budgeting and working moms learn about it through providing for their families.

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  4. As long as both of those women have to buy and cook food, arrange transportation for kids, and purchase clothing...among other things...there's no reason one should have more of a grasp on the issues facing the economy than anyone else. And stay at homers still have to juggle bills and the rising cost of goods and services. Maybe with a little less financial freedom as the trade off, but really, does that make them less aware?

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  5. I've done both and I have to say it's more work staying home then going to work. More pocket book juggling,etc if we are not the pulse of the American economy then I don't know what is.

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  6. BTW Anne Romney's first 3 babies were raised in a one bedroom basement apartment.

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  7. I might be in the minority here with this comment, and feel free to hate me. I don't think anyone is questioning that SAHMs are not working hard. But I think in a different perspective, families who can live (and live well) with 1 income and 1 parent at home may not understand what it's like to have 2 jobs just to put food on the table. I don't think this is limited to working women or at home women, but I do think it has to do with affluency. I think Hilary was trying to make a point about rich vs poor, which seems to be what a lot of today's politics is about.

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    1. I agree that her statement was more about affluence than the bandwagon of working vs. stay at home moms everyone has jumped on.

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  8. I think her statement has been completely misconstrued from the way she meant it. Mostly because she did a really poor job of communicating it.

    Of course stay at home moms are in touch with economic issues. They are normally the ones balancing the budget and trying to make ends meet. They aren't just in touch, they are hands on.

    To the second question, I don't think any affluent person that has been in that position their entire lives is capable of understanding the challenges faced by the middle class and lower income families. They have no base of reference for their understanding, and are therefore ignorant of the challenges we face.

    PS I wrote about this today too.

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    1. Interesting, but I have to say most of the most well-off moms I know are an example of why I can't agree. Most of them are involved in many volunteer organizations to help those less fortunate groups. They use these experiences to learn and teach others and have a great frame of reference.

      Sometimes, affluence affords women opportunities for volunteer work and committees that really tune them into the real pulse of those less fortunate.

      I concede that there those women who do not take advantage of those opportunities to volunteer and might not have a base of reference.

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    2. Not knowing much about here, I look up Ann Romney on Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ann_Romney). She doesn't earn a paycheck, but I bet she is just as busy as Hilary Rosen trying to make the world a better place.

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  9. absolutely yes. I think a stay at home mom can look at things from the outside and see an even bigger picture of it all because she isn't stuck in the middle of things. Or is she. Who's the one who reaps the rewards of what the economy has to offer anyway? She pays the gas to haul the kids around. She buys the groceries and pays the cashier, she see what goes on int the medical society when she takes her child in for a visit and gets the bill, I could go on and on. I admire those women who can work outside the home and still come home and still be mom at the end of the day.What people need to realize is that women have been the backbone of the society for centuries whether they stay at home or not.

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  10. @GoingsOn Like Juniper said. Well said.

    Have a nice weekend alL!

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  11. I am glad to see this post. We must keep talking and voteing, know our history and who we are as Americans and children of God.

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  12. I don't see anything wrong with being a stay-at-home mom, and I'm sure it's a lot of work. But if we're talking about someone who was raised in such a privileged family that she never had to hold down a job even as a teenager or young adult, accusing that person of being out of touch with the real world is not terribly unfair. I mean, staying home with your kids, while I do agree it qualifies as a full-time job, it is also an investment in your own family. Most decent parents are willing to do whatever it takes to ensure the survival of their own offspring. I'm not a fan of parents who act like they deserve a medal for taking care of the children they chose to have. There are people out there who go to jobs they may or may not enjoy day after day because they literally have no choice since they were not born into a super-cushy financial situation. I think someone who's never experienced that might have a hard time understanding what it's like.

    I admire any stay-at-home mom who uses any extra energy she has to make the world a better place. But I think that seeing a need and actually experiencing that need for oneself are two different things. It's the same as me trying to provide comfort for someone who's experiencing a divorce. I can imagine the pain and feel compassion for that person. From the outside, I definitely would not consider myself uncaring just because I've never been through it. But the fact remains I will never understand it the way someone would if they had been down that road themselves. I would assume that many moms who have no choice but to work outside the home would happily trade their situation for the financial liberation to spend more of their time doing volunteer work on their own terms. I personally have no idea what it's like to be a stay-at-home mom and maybe I never will, so I'm just offering another perspective here.

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    1. The thing is, Ann Romney's kids are grown, so her days of being an out of touch affluent stay at home mom happened 27 years ago. Today she "works" as a political wife even though she doesn't get a paycheck.

      I think work is work whether you get paid for it or not and I can’t name many 1st ladies that came from underprivileged backgrounds that helped them truly relate to a lower class’ needs in a first hand way.

      Most of the programs that help those in need could not exist without volunteers. I don't think any of them would turn away a help just because they are affluent and unable to relate. These are the experiences that absolutely help them relate to things like living paycheck to paycheck even if it isn't happening to themselves.

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  13. Hi! Jennifer, nice to meet you- I found you through comments on the other Jennifer's blog. Looks like you and I have a lot of similar beliefs. I Believe that both types of moms are able to understand the economy and thing around them. You do not have to experience everything in life to have at least a basic understanding. I don't have to do drugs to know they are bad for me- I have seen first hand through family the affects they can have- so while I might not fully be able to emphasize and know- I can understand and help and do my part.

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  14. Emmy, I think you explained how I feel better than I could on the other blog!

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