My friend Wendy, from Ordinary Miracles, shared a Facebook blog post from Baby Sideburns entitled Ten Things I Really F'ing Want For Mother's Day with me last week.
The author, Karen Alpert, really stirred up some Facebook controversy with her post that has already generated 221 comments and over 300k "likes".
Here is what Karen "Really F'ing Wants" for Mother's Day this year:
"1. I don’t want to wipe a single a$$ all day. I think all kids should have to hold their poop in on Mother’s Day. Now that would make it special.
2. I want brunch. But not with the whole frigging family. I want brunch with my other mommy friends. See ya, rugrats. Mommy’s coming back drunk on laughter and bloody marys.
3. I want to sleep in. But not with my hooligans shouting “MOMMYYYYYY!!!” at the top of their lungs and ramming one of those giant cannon thingies into the door to bust inside. To all the hubbies reading this: when the rugrats wake up, take them outside immediately. Not downstairs. OUTSIDE. That’s right, scoop them up in a football hold and rush them out the door. I’m F’ing serious. Change their diapers and their clothes on the front lawn if you have to. Just don’t let them wake my ass up.
4. I want a card. But not a stupid Hallmark card. I want one of those awesome homemade ones made with macaroni. Only I want the macaroni cooked and poured into a bowl and covered with a delicious cream sauce and paired with a giant bottle of red wine.
5. Jewelry jewelry jewelry. Unless it’s one of those stupid necklaces made with cheap plastic beads. None of that $h!t. Unless Tiffany’s is suddenly selling overpriced plastic bead necklaces. That can be returned for money. Because I don’t want to exchange it and the only thing I can afford is a stupid a$$ pen or keychain.
6. I want you to cook breakfast for me. In someone else’s kitchen.
7. I want to pee and poop alone. I will prepare for the day by downing a tanker truck full of liquid and eating ridiculous amounts of fiber.
8. I want chocolate. But not just any ole chocolate. I want the kind that someone has taken a fat Sharpie to and blacked out the F’ing calorie section.
9. I want a good present. Like one I’ll really like. It’s not the thought that counts. It’s MY thought that counts. And my thought should not be WTF?
10. I want ten “Leave me the f--k alone” coupons with no expiration date."
**some curse words were cleaned up a bit by me for my readers**
Mother's Day 2013 with my boys
I know I'm stirring the pot here, and you can hop on over to Karen's post to read some of the comments there, but let's start a discussion here also.
It's Feedback Friday....
What do you think about Karen's list of 10 things she "f'ing" wants for Mother's Day?