5.22.2008

A Rundown of my Oddities

It occurs to me sometimes, usually when I'm talking with a new friend, that some of my quirks are really oddities. Luckily, my friends seem to accept them as something that goes along with the package. I'm going to bare myself to the world and embrace them...

1. While most people are said to have a "fight or flight" reflex, I ended up with a fall down reflex. If my husband should surprise me unexpectedly, I usually end up in a ball on the ground for some reason. I think my brain has it confused with "stop drop and roll".

2. While I love to cook, I could live the rest of my life on eggs, Fruity Pebbles, and cake.

3. I'm obsessive compulsive with "projects" I have to have immediate gratification and will work obsessively until something is done, be it mulch, painting, or a book. If I've started something "important" (that term is relative) the house is a mess, there's no dinner, and I forget to go the baseball practice while I finish. I often get texts or phone calls that start with, "Okay, what new project are you up to? I haven't seen or heard from you in days!"

4. I am the best hide and seek player. If the kids want to play I usually force my husband to look for all of us and the whole game disintegrates around everyone searching for Mommy. Not to brag, but I can fit in some pretty weird places and get myself in this Zen state so I don't move or make a sound.

5. I'm obsessed with the color green that is the background for this blog, hence my love of moss and all other things I can find with this color. I have a friend that feeds this obsession with little gifts now and then of fantastic green things (place mats, artificial moss, beautiful pieces of glass).

6. I seriously pretend I'm in the movie Kill Bill during kickboxing class. I think my husband would fall on the floor laughing if he ever watched me.

7. I suffer from "the crazies" at night. At least once a week I wake up my husband in utter terror, convinced that I see something in our room. It could be a man coming to murder me, a spider lowering itself down from the ceiling toward my face, a bunny hopping along the floor (don't ask)... I scare the s$#t out of him when I panic because my eyes are wide open and I still see it!

8. I sing almost all day. When I get in the car the only time I'm not singing is when I'm on the phone, I have music on all the time in the house with speakers all over (including the garage and the deck) and even when the music isn't on I usually sing under my breath. Helper Munchkin takes after me and my husband laughs when he will sing his Happy Meal request or a song about having to go to the bathroom.

9. I don't drink coffee in the morning. Enough said.

10. I love to play pranks and practical jokes. Just ask all my neighbors. My particular favorite was this one:


I strung giant ladies underpants with skid marks (ingenious use of a Hershey's Kiss) across my neighbor's driveway the first morning of the neighborhood garage sale last summer. They were still sleeping and all the garage sale ladies were driving by slowly with the most curious expressions. I should mention that this particular neighbor is PERFECT! She is an interior decorator and he keeps the yard immaculately groomed!
Those underwear have been the cornerstone of many good pranks over the years. I will have to devote a whole post to all the pranks one day.

4 comments :

  1. I almost fell out of my chair reading that one! LOL! While I share some of those funny little quirks, quite happily...others kind of freak me out! Ha-ha!
    Gotta say…the granny panty prank is the BEST! :)

    Gotta love ya though!
    Have a great holiday!

    ReplyDelete
  2. A few things: The night time scare thing...are you still asleep during all of this? I don't know if I'd ever want to go to sleep!

    And, Boy, am I EVER glad I'm not your neighbor!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Love the list! One reason I don't do puzzles very often- i don't do ANYTHING else until it is all done - hungry kids or not! Was your neighbor upset about the panties? That's hilarious!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Okay, the underwear? I'm totally stealing that idea, thankyouverymuch.
    Brilliant.

    ReplyDelete

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