Readers Remorse

It's over. I can't believe it. I shouldn't have read it so fast. I knew it would only make it come to an end more quickly, but I plowed ahead greedily absorbing the pages - sometimes 100 in a sitting. I looked forward to each chance to get my next "hit" like any drug addict, and now I'm spent and sad and wishing I'd taken my time.

Yes, I've finished the 4th and last book of the Twilight series and I'm not ready to let Bella and Edward go yet. I want to see how it turns out, how their lives unfold, I want their day-to-day vampire life spelled out in exhaustive detail. (I also wish to know many other things that I can't mention here for fear of spoiling the read for the rest of you who are still catching up.)

This is nothing new for me, I get emotionally involved...in everything. I cried at the end of the HBO series Six Feet Under and couldn't imagine my life without these characters, I've been lost without Lost over the many months. I was in a deep depression after I finished Pillars of the Earth and elated to learn there was a sequel - I plowed through it though, no lesson learned. I can't help it, I get attached. I get attached to my kid's teachers, my customers while working on projects together, the friendly UPS guy (I really hated his substitute during Christmas), the little old Terminix guy I employed long after my bug problem was solved.

I knew this was going to be a problem after I finished the first book, Twilight, and ran around the very next day like a crazed crack fiend looking for the next book. I tamed myself until Christmas under threat, but once those last two books were in my hot little hands on Christmas day, all bets were off. I devoured them in a week and now I'm stuck here, kinda blue.

I do have to say, however, the last book really tied up loose ends and gave me the ending I can live with. It was still a shock to see those two little words "the end" typed out in black and white, but I think in time (and with therapy) I can come to terms with the end of this series and accept it's really over.

Thank you, Stephenie Meyer, for whisking me away to the world of fantasy; of love and friendship and family bonds. A fantastic world of the unbelievable that becomes believable. A trip into the world of great fiction that reminds me why I love to read.

Open Thank You Letter to my Kickboxing Classmates

Thank you to the girl in the front row who exercises like she's on too much Zanex while underwater. I'm not sure what soundtrack is playing in your head, but it provides me with some comic relief. And to "kickboxer dude" who looks as though he's in a street fight during the routine, thank you for giving me that odd mixture of fear and amusement.

To the woman who grimaces and lunges as if she's fighting off the devil himself, and the rebel who continues to bend at the waist when the instructor is screaming "Get your BUTT down!"

To the big girls and skinny girls who show me that fitness comes in all shapes and sizes. To the ones with boobs that have me thanking God I don't have them and to the one's who don't that make me feel normal.

To the drop-ins that have no idea what's going on but still try anyway, and to the regulars that call me out when I've missed class too many times.

To the two beautiful older ladies who keep up with the rest of us and inspire me to kick higher and punch harder. And to the 19 year old who pisses me off by her impossibly flat abs. If only I could tell her how wonderful she will think this body is when she looks back in 5, 10, 20 years or after a few kids, but she'll never believe it - none of us did.

To the ones dragging screaming kids to the childcare center with steely resolve for "my time" and to the ones who skip class because those same kids won't let go of mom's leg.

To the instructors who inspire us with their energy even though they are teaching their 2nd or 3rd class that day.

To the "loud count-er" who keeps me simultaneously on track and annoyed, and to the "creeper" that is always infringing on my personal space but keeps me on my toes.

To great sound tracks we can sing along to...or is that just me? The strange mix of Britney Spears, The Romantics, and Fergie on speed always cracks me up!

To the girl who smells like flowers and the stinky ones who make me rethink elements of my own hygiene. To the ones who put on make up and those that don't for taking the time or not, and to the crazy outfits some of us show up in (seriously, how did you fit into those short shorts?)

Thanks to all of you for entertaining and inspiring and making me look forward to my Monday and Wednesday mornings...Remember, "Don't give up on you!"