A local radio station had a call-in topic the other day that had me in stitches...
Call in to tell the DJ something you wish you could un-see.
Some of the calls cracked me up and some I could totally relate to, so I thought I'd try it here. Want to know mine? (shudder...) Okay, if you insist...
When I was a teen in the early 80's, short shorts were popular with women and men. Long cargo shorts were unheard of (unfortunately). I was sitting across from an older male relative who crossed his legs - ankle over knee:
Well, like I said, he was wearing short shorts and one of his wrinkled old balls slipped out and he was completely unaware. I can remember simultaneously thinking "What the hell IS that?!?" and "Oh, no, I know what that is!" at the same time. Let's say I wish I hadn't seen that!
Now, it's your turn...
Tell me about something you've seen in your life you wish you could UN-SEE!
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oh my! Yep, same thing happened to me, but it was my father. He was in the hospital and his gown was open as he went to get up out of the bed, I saw it all! OMG! Those gowns should be outlawed :)
ReplyDeleteoh the first things that came to mind were the same as you too!
ReplyDeleteOnce I was on a boat with Dad's friend driving it.... sitting in the captain's chair, in shorts that were too short, wrinkly balls hanging out! same thoughts crossed my mind.. "what's that? oh MAN! I need to wash my eyes!". Then another time, when I might have been about 10 or 11, I walked into the bathroom at my friend's house to wash my hands, not realising her dad was in there with his leg up on the bath, drying himself off after a shower.... yikes.... and the same poor man was caught by me again another time. I can't get that image out of my head!
Same exact sight...only a much younger set of balls. Ugh. Never have been able to get that image out of my mind. My reaction was the same as yours, and then it's like a stupid tractor beam, your brain keeps saying "No way..." and makes you glance over again and again (sorta like plumbers crack!)
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness!!! I haven't been able to stop laughing since I read this! The same thing happened to me...with my brother in law (prebrother in law)...we were in high school...he was in running shorts and whoop there it is...I about died!
ReplyDeleteI was at the farm center with my two youngest sons YESTERDAY when we walked around the corner from visiting the chickens to see two hogs "making a baby". The angle we had and the particular timing makes describing what we saw too graphic, messy, and disgusting to share with your readers. I tried to distract them as we turned to go the other way (I decided not to take a quick phone pic for hubs); but 9 year old was left with lots of questions and incorrect theories that we'll be talking more about this weekend.
ReplyDeleteI needed a good laugh today. I'm congested & feel yuck.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could unsee any scar or incision my mother showed me after any of her surgeries. She's had a couple, but yuck. Stop Mom!
I'm not alone in witnessing the nut slip! Awesome!
ReplyDeleteI keep thinking about it and another sight that is burned into my brain is that Dick Clark kiss a few New Year's Eves ago...ewwww...
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ReplyDeleteSimilar, a friend and I were walking the neighborhood when we were young teens, and a convertible volkswagen bug pulled over and a naked guy got out and asked, "you wanna *$#@???" My friend and I looked at each other, burst out laughing and RAN as fast as we could away from there! Wish I never saw that! :P
ReplyDeleteWhen I was a young teen, our Minister was visiting our home. I was the unfortunate person who used the bathroom after he exited. Still burned in my brain is the floater he left in the toilet.
ReplyDeleteIt looks like you've brought a lot of repressed nut-memories to the surface today! Just this last summer a random old man came to the garage sale I was having with my sister, and he sat down on a stool, spread his legs wide in his roomy shorts, and started telling us random old man stories. He stayed for half an hour. I had to get up and go inside. Ugh.
ReplyDeleteOh you are soooo not alone. I remember being about 10 and strolling through the park, when I happened upon an older guy, sitting against a tree reading a book... and letting it all hang out.
ReplyDeleteThen there was the time when I was like 11 or 12 and walked in on my parents...stab me in the eye.
We took our kids to the lake one summer afternoon and when I turned around an old very wrinkly old man was slipping off his pants to reveal a very worn out thong that he probably has used since his 20's. I wanted to puke and immediately ushered my kids back to the car to find another section of the lake to play in far far away.
ReplyDeletelol I have not stopped laughing!! I do have a couple memories burned into my brain about loose nuts, but it makes it all the more hilarious sitting next to my husband wearing his boxers letting it all hang out! And this is a nightly show, ladies...
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ReplyDeleteOMG!! Tooo funny! You're the best for throwing it all out there!
ReplyDeleteNut slips are the best! So funny! It's a very good thing that length of shorts is not popular anymore. I pitty the men who decide they are cool and bring them back in vogue!!!
ReplyDeleteI have a nut slip story from when I was about 10 but the worst thing I wish I could unsee is not funny like that. A few years ago I was living in San Diego, there was a man who is highly against abortions. He drive a little white pick up truck with a reader board or something like that on the back. He has pictures of aborted fetuses all over it. I would randomly see him on the freeway every so often. The worst is when I would have my kids with me and I would have to try to distract them with something in the opposite direction so they might not see all the graphic gore. It was pretty horrible. I don't miss him at all!
Oh my, mine is similar but is much grosser, and thank goodness my dad was with me.
ReplyDeleteMy dad and I were out to lunch at McDonalds downtown, and my back was to the window. There was a man at a booth not too far away staring at me or "looking out the window" so I thought, while squirming in his seat A LOT. Then I looked under the table and saw his thing hanging out and quickly put all the pieces of the puzzle together! What a gross man! I can't even drive by that McDonalds without that horrible memory coming back! Yuck.
Thanks for all the laughs from everyone else!
I think the ball slips have happened to us all!
ReplyDeleteMine is another form of grossness: I was a university student at the time, commuting to and from campus on public transportation. In front of me on one particular crowded bus was a youngish man (maybe 30s?). Anyhow, I was hardly paying attention at first, but out the corner of my eye, I could've sworn I saw something moving on his head. Another look quickly revealed MANY tiny little bugs happily roaming this man's scalp!!! LICE!!!! As if that wasn't gross enough, the fact that it didn't seem to itch or bother him, and that the lice seemed perfectly content on their host about made me hurl. The bus was too crowded to switch seats, so there I sat - paralyzed in disgust!
YUCK YUCK YUCK!!!!
Wow, that was gross, Jen. LOL. And wow, there were a lot of "nut slip" stories. Haha!!! Yuck.
ReplyDeleteI have many a story from back in the day living in the fraternity house when I wanted to run out of a room and scream "I'm blind" or "Somebody wash my eyes." But I'm not sure those stories would be appropriate here. LOL.